In my visionquest, you looked like a coyote trickster, but you turned out to be a hamster

[gurdonark]

I like those pet store hamsters who look like panda bears. Notwithstanding a high school and college literature class career filled with enough 'appearance v. reality' to kill the wayward boyfriend in the Dorothy L. Sayers novel "Strong Poison", I posit that appearance sometimes exceeds the reality. I am sure I'm not the only one who prefers David Bowie's parody of "Let's Spend the Night Together" to the original Stones version, and I believe I am not the only person who frequently finds myself more attracted to ethnic restaurants in my own country more than to the restaurants of the native "ethnic" country. I am nothing if not conventional, and I am easily attracted to the look of the thing rather than the thing itself. It's the sort of aesthetic that makes one prefer Middle Earth to good old Earth, or makes one like the New York Dolls at all.

Lately I wonder about the power of metaphor in my life. I like the use of ideas to express feelings for which I have no literal description. Sometimes I notice that I figuratively believe things that others literally believe. Sometimes I wonder if this "metaphoric" belief is somehow lesser or wrong. I rarely am worried about the literal verities, any more than I worry about integrated circuits when I turn on my television. I do not mean to imply, or rather do not mean to fully imply, that facts are irrelevant. I love facts. Facts and science and hard core knowledge matter. But how often in my life are facts only narrative?

I sometimes feel that everything is merely preface and prologue for a story I'm narrating to myself. This story has faith and fortune and facts and fictions and feelings and curious uncertainties all throughout it. But for all the gold and dross intermixed, the goal must be some kind of truth. Not the literal, place in a baggy, if you can't touch it, it ain't real truth, but a truth based on things that go beyond the number of meters in a kilometer. A truth of the heart, if you will. A truth that pretends that a heart does things other than pump blood for a very short while.

But I know the paradox inherent in focusing on fool's gold as well as gold. Sometimes the pyrite overwhelms. It's shiny, all right, but it's not "real" in either of my senses. How much can I mine before I am no longer true? Time will tell,and my mental prospector's hammer is still sharp, and hammering rock.

Is it okay to lack literal belief, and yet address someone who has a literal belief in the language of what for me is metaphor and "visualization"? I hope so. But did you ever see those panda bear hamsters eat bamboo? I wonder if they could.

Comments

[robertstheology.livejournal.com]

I think it is perfectly okay to lack literal belief, and to have a wonderful conversation with someone who does have literal beliefs. I was the literal belief type myself, until only recently. I have been enriched by a new appreciation of myth and metaphor, which can convey deep truth-truth which often transcends "facts" like 1 inch equals 2.54 centimetres.

I would still be a very conservative Christian by your standards, according to what I have gleaned from your postings. But I love your point of view, and the interesting way you express it. You have often stimulated my thinking, and added beauty and enjoyment to my day.

I still believe in the Bible, that Jesus Christ is God, and that he created all things. But I have changed my mind on the interpretation of Genesis. The cosmos was created 14.7 billion years ago by a type of "big bang". And some form of evolution seems to have been used in the development of life on earth. I don't have a clue as to exactly how man arrived on the scene, or as to exactly when this happened. I don't think that Genesis was written to answer such questions.

[gurdonark.livejournal.com]

I remember the woman who asked me a few years back, "Are you a Christian?". I had to answer honestly, as I understood her viewpoint from the context of our discussions, "not in the way you mean". What a curious feeling that was for me.

I think it's hard to be "not this, not that", and so much better to just be simple things like "I think people should care about each other" and "I'm still learning the answers, but I've got some notion of the questions".

[robertstheology.livejournal.com]

amen!

I once knew everything, now I know almost nothing. But I do know this, "it's all about love."

[gurdonark.livejournal.com]

On my birthday, in 1984, I went to see a band called the Dream Syndicate in a little club in Dallas called Tango, where giant frogs played musical instruments on the roof. I'll never forget their best song, "Tell Me when It's Over", a Lou Reed homage with the line:

"Well, I thought I knew the answer--but no question was posed".

[poetbear.livejournal.com]

it's been a while since anyone asked me if i was a
Christian, and anyone who's read my userinfo knows
i describe myself as a Zen Baptist. i guess i would
have to answer many Christians the same as you did,
Bruce, but i agree with Robertstheology, too. once i
thought i knew it all, now i know almost nothing, but i,
too, know that it's all about love.~paul

redneck buddhist

[honoriartist.livejournal.com]

There's a sign in front of one of the houses in my neighborhood that looks like a for-sale real estate sign except that it's black with red letters and says "Redneck Buddhist." Your post reminded me of the sign. I'm reading teachings of Pema Chodron Start where you are these days. I'm looking for a new job so it's a great book to stay pleasantly confident during a time I'm usually most stressed - jobhunting times. Painting watercolors helps too.

Re: redneck buddhist

[poetbear.livejournal.com]

sounds like Zen philosophy to me! Start where
you are sounds right to me. i'll have to look
up Pema Chodron in my local library. i was raised
to be a good Southren Baptist, but am really more
of a Bhuddist by nature, thus--Zen Baptist!--we can remedy all this jobhunting, though, just go back to the Southern tradition of voting Democratic next election!~paul

Re: redneck buddhist

[poetbear.livejournal.com]

send me your snail mail addy to poetbear@hotmail.com, and i will sent you a
genuine piece of mail art, signed by the artist
(me)--~paul